The only thing more depressing than hearing your neighbor having really bad sex on Valentine’s day, and be alone in bed at the time….
…is to be putting your makeup on for work at 9am on a Friday morning, and hear your other neighbor presumably having shower sex. And I say presumably, as he is Spanish and I could not understand anything. And sad, because…well,
1. His name is Fabio (yeah! people are really named that)
2. I thought he was gay, as he really cares about his flower/wall things that keep me from pulling into my driveway without hitting them….(that’s what she said…?)
3. Our bathrooms are the size of a closet…not walkins, which I do have and they are bigger. That HAD TO HURT!
Well, regardless, I wasn’t able to hear the music I was listening to over the splashing and weird Spanish sex noises. Who’s ready for some awkwardness in the laundry room?
So having what I hope you all (when I say all, I mean the three of you that read this…one of you being my sister I presume?) consider to be a humorous blog about my “sad single life,” I do joke around a lot about being sad and lonely. One thing that I do oftentimes take for granted even though I AM sad and lonely, is that no one is prohibiting me by law from being with the person I want to be with or saying hurtful things to me, or in any way protesting my ability to be with someone. (N.B. no one is actually rushing to be with me, so there is also that…maybe there would be protests, who knows?). Continue reading