Why a Green Thumb Might Be Better Than A Man

And you thought "tree hugging" was just a euphemism for loving nature!

So this is the week for reader friend submissions! Another friend, we’ll call her “has a boyfriend but is still relatable.” Maybe “gets it” for short? Well, Gets It sent this article from the blog, THE FRISKY (I can already get on board with a name like that!), called 5 Reasons Why Having A Plant Is Better Than A Boyfriend. Click the link to read the full article, but obviously you are on my blog, so either come on back or just read on.

Betty and her plant, Roger, are celebrating 25 happy years together. Mazel Tov, you two!

The author makes 5 points (duh! as clearly stated in the title):

    1. They are always available to listen.

    2. They need you, but not too much.

    3. They never complain about anything.

    4. They never quit you.

    5. They get along with everybody.

Beware! You might suck at gardening just as much as you do at relationships...

Well, she makes some compelling points. Lets examine #1 first. You know when you call up that friend who has the perfect boyfriend, perfect job, perfect life basically? And she JUST DOESN”T HAVE TIME FOR YOU? Point one to the plant. If I have to hear one more person complain to me about the something I want (a man) but can’t seem to get (a man to even call me back), I won’t do anything crazy (I’m not that type of person), but I will just get really annoyed!!

With point #2, she is clearly talking about all y’all clingers out there! Men and Women!! People want to feel needed, but know one wants to feel like their partner’s mother. That is what actual mothers are for.

#3, basically if the plant dies…it’s because you killed. They can’t complain that you are feeding (watering) it too much or smothering it (watering).

#4, kind of the same deal as #3 don’t you think? They don’t quit you unless YOU quit them!

And finally, #5, I’m gonna have to disagree with! Lady, ever hear of allergies? Cause I have! And so does my runny nose! So I guess just make sure you are “compatible” with your plant.

As for me, I am off to Home Depot to buy some herbs this weekend. Hey, if you can’t find a man, might as well have a plant that you can use…ahh #6!

    6. You get to use them. They can’t use you.

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