My friend GChatted this article from The Daily Beast to me this morning: More Rich, High-Powered Women Are Turning to Matchmakers to Find Love. Read it…it basically is a sob story for Rich, Powerful Women and why they can’t meet men BECAUSE they are so Rich and Powerful….AWWW! Poor Not so Poor You!!

Maybe Martha could find man like this?

So high powered CEOs, women in charge, Martha Stewart, Bosses basically are turning to matchmakers because they can’t go use online dating, they can’t go into a bar to pick up randos, they can’t really date in their work worlds….to which I have to say:

I DO NOT FEEL SORRY FOR YOU IN ANY WAY BECAUSE YOU HAVE THE MONEY TO PAY FOR THESE SERVICES!! I DO NOT!

Most of these high powered women, yes work very, very hard to deserve these lives. They work so hard that they don’t have the time to meet men, to go out and find them…but who is in the office before you and staying way after you? YOUR ASSISTANT! Your underpaid, overworked ASSISTANT!

You better not be mean to your assistants, ladies!!! Look how that worked in Working Girl!!!

So, speaking from experience as an assistant, we actually have it tough. More often than not, our personal lives come second to those of the lives we are assisting. Ok, yes I understand that it might be hard for a high powered CEO to put themselves out their so publically  and look desperate…but they do have the finances to fix that. To surround themselves by the correct people, to go to the right places….to pay people to shop for them….etc.
But the assistants sitting back in the office, well, they are working hard and not really able to find time to meet Mr. Right either (or Mr. Wrong, or Mr. Good for a Fun Time). Because even after they leave the office at whatever hour, well, they are off to work drinks, or a work event. Because when you’re an assistant, you are doing anything to get ahead. And let’s be honest…what’s not going to help you get ahead at work? Oh, I don’t know! Dating someone from work…from the office next door, from the place you want to work. But once again, let’s be honest, where is the only place you are meeting someone without your liver being completely diluted in grain alcohol? You got it!

Rut Roh! I know what they will be talking about at the watercooler on Monday!

So….here is my request Matchmakers of the world! How about rather than catering only to the millionaire women of the world that can afford to pay $20,000 and up, why don’t you offer an assistant’s discount? Hook a girl up! Literally!! And maybe realize that we are in a down economy and charging $20,000 a date is ABSURD!!!

This $5000 Hamburger is also ABSURD!