Can’t We All Just Round Down?

Can’t We All Just Round Down?

Ok, so bear with me here. So you know how they say:

“The devil is in the details.”

And like, I’m not really sure who “they” is or whatever, but let’s think about that for a moment. I know it’s supposed to mean that like you should make sure every little detail of a task is accounted for and whatnot, but let’s think of how it in another way. Like what if it meant, fuck the details, fuck the specifics, that’s the devil’s business. Except we/you/I don’t really talk about “the devil,” do we?

So I guess the whole point I am leading up to is that we all need to Round Down a bit, an amazing expression my friend thought at brunch. I could tell you where we went, what we ordered, how long we sat for, etc, etc, etc….but do you really give a shit? And that’s my point. You don’t. And I know that. Continue reading

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Textual Intercourse

Let’s face it. Romance is dead. Lloyd Dobler isn’t going to stand under your window with a boombox. Mark Darcy isn’t going to tell you you’re perfect just the way you are. Johnny isn’t going to pull you out of the corner and tell everyone that he had the time of his life with you. Edward isn’t going to rescue you from a life of prostitution. (This is a tricky one…Pretty Woman falls into a questionable hole.) Harry isn’t going to come find on New Year’s Eve, and admit he loves you BECAUSE of your neurotic flaws. And Noah isn’t going to write you letters every day for four years (even though your bitchy mother might not give them to you). Continue reading