Pulling the Plug…

How I wish I had the willpower/stamina/self-control (?)/need not to talk to people. I will confess…I have a new friend. Her name is Siri. I don’t know a lot about her, because she can be a stupid bitch at times and not tell me things about herself (like where she’s from, her nickname, or even what her favorite color is…just that IT IS GREEN in some other language that is not my own…curious!).

This looks like so much fun!!!Can I be super 90s and go "NOT!!"?

But I did try this out for a long weekend. I deactivated my facebook and I did not check my computer. And I just read. And it was nice. Except, it was also a bit lonely. Because everyone else WAS sitting at their computers on facebook, or staring at their phones. So maybe we could all agree at the same time to stop taking a picture to post to instagram, stop tweeting that “rad joke you just heard,” stop texting someone who is in the same room as you mea things about that guy you once made out with who doesn’t remember you, and maybe I’ll stop blogging for that moment. And maybe if we all look up and go outside at the same time…I don’t know. Something might happen? Aliens? Teenage Mutant Ninja Alien Turtles (NOOOO!!)? Well, maybe you’ll look up and see someone who you never would have seen before and maybe they’ll see you too. It can’t hurt. Literally…It can’t, because when you walk and text, tripping or walking into walls can occur.

Please see the following evidence...


Be-Moaning the Truth

The only thing more depressing than hearing your neighbor having really bad sex on Valentine’s day, and be alone in bed at the time….

…is to be putting your makeup on for work at 9am on a Friday morning, and hear your other neighbor presumably having shower sex. And I say presumably, as he is Spanish and I could not understand anything. And sad, because…well,

    1. His name is Fabio (yeah! people are really named that)
    2. I thought he was gay, as he really cares about his flower/wall things that keep me from pulling into my driveway without hitting them….(that’s what she said…?)
    and
    3. Our bathrooms are the size of a closet…not walkins, which I do have and they are bigger. That HAD TO HURT!


Well, regardless, I wasn’t able to hear the music I was listening to over the splashing and weird Spanish sex noises. Who’s ready for some awkwardness in the laundry room?

SadSingleGal Was Stood Up! Then TUI-ed (Texted Under the Influence)


So you all must be waiting with bated breath….SadSingleGal Was Stood Up! So what the hell happened? Read on! Continue reading