Behind Every Great (Single)Woman, Is A Great (Most Likely Single) Assistant

My friend GChatted this article from The Daily Beast to me this morning: More Rich, High-Powered Women Are Turning to Matchmakers to Find Love. Read it…it basically is a sob story for Rich, Powerful Women and why they can’t meet men BECAUSE they are so Rich and Powerful….AWWW! Poor Not so Poor You!!

Maybe Martha could find man like this?

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Walk Like A Man, Talk Like A Man….

Come on, you all know the song! Especially from the AMAZING (or as I Happy Ending-ly like to say “AHMAZZING”) Robert Downey Jr. classic, Heart and Souls….

If you don’t know this movie….SEE it!!

So the other day at work, a writer came in. My boss was running late, so I was chatting with him about writing and whatnot…So he asks me what I write. I tell him I write about being single…about being single in LA. To which he HILARIOUSLY goes “Why are you single?” Hold the phone dude…are we in therapy? That’s on Tuesdays! Not Wednesdays! I wasn’t really offended or anything, I mean, he was in fact attempting to compliment me (not creepily, I think just in the “I’m a writer, I want to know what’s going on” type of way).

Well a few days later, I was sitting down to talk with someone else. This new friend is married with child, so when I was telling her about what I write (yeah, I talk about my blog a lot…I’m one of those people…I have a BLOG…), and we get to chatting about when she was single. And she says, “The secret is to think like a man.”

Now..before you go…oh- no- she -DI-dn’t…she did not just reference that shitatious STEVE HARVEY based movie that is billboarded all over!….she didn’t. Because that movie is about this book:

Nothing on this planet can compare with a woman’s love—it is kind and compassionate, patient and nurturing, generous and sweet and unconditional. Pure. If you are her man, she will walk on water and through a mountain for you, too, no matter how you’ve acted out, no matter what crazy thing you’ve done, no matter the time or demand. If you are her man, she will talk to you until there just aren’t any more words left to say, encourage you when you’re at rock bottom and think there just isn’t any way out, hold you in her arms when you’re sick, and laugh with you when you’re up. And if you’re her man and that woman loves you—I mean really loves you?—she will shine you up when you’re dusty, encourage you when you’re down, defend you even when she’s not so sure you were right, and hang on your every word, even when you’re not saying anything worth listening to. And no matter what you do, no matter how many times her friends say you’re no good, no matter how many times you slam the door on the relationship, she will give you her very best and then some, and keep right on trying to win over your heart, even when you act like everything she’s done to convince you she’s The One just isn’t good enough.
That’s a woman’s love—it stands the test of time, logic, and all circumstance. ”

        – Steve Harvey…just to give you a sample of the bullshit that is this book.

And please don’t go thinking the movie is any different. Take a look at the poster:

Wow….really? Let “THE MIND GAMES BEGIN“? Are you kidding me?

So, no, when she said think like a man, she meant it in neither of these ways. What she instead meant was, as ladies we so often take things SOOOOO ridiculously seriously. Every little thing we over think. So, sometimes, it is better to actually ‘think’ like a man…under think the situation and just have fun.

Yes this is a stock image entitled, TWO YOUNG MEN HAVING FUN IN BUSY BAR. So, point made.

Por ejemplo, use me as an example. But let’s time travel back to the days of yore…No, not last week…but some time back…that I met at a bar. A meet cute perhaps? Well, he was pretty cute. And he liked me…and I liked him. But if only I had thought like a man. And not in the whole notion of I am going to play a game to make him think I’m NOT playing a game game…you got it? No, because it is confusing. Basically, I was probably a little too much more normally “girly” self, and even if he liked me just as much as I liked him, I probably showed it a hell of a lot more…I do tend to wear my heart on my sleeve (funny…because today I literally am wearing a sweater with hearts on the sleeve).

girlfriends, are we really that different?

But in man mind, I think their hearts do tend to be a little more closed off, a little more reserved. Which is so much better! It’s like when you go to the flea market (I know all the guys that read this here, are like, duh, of course i know…) and you see something you really like. Well, you play it cool. I go up to the guy, ask how much it is, and when he answers back $25, I totally lowball with $16, even though I really want it. Because he also really wants me to buy it, so he’s probably going to let me have it for $20.

So rather than thinking of love as some game, or as the best karaoke song says “as a battlefield,” think of it as actually not showing all your cards at once. Because the longer you keep them hidden, the bigger the pot you might be able to win.

Wow! It looks like she won 2 guys!!

SadSingleGal Was Stood Up! Then TUI-ed (Texted Under the Influence)


So you all must be waiting with bated breath….SadSingleGal Was Stood Up! So what the hell happened? Read on! Continue reading

Sad Single No More…?

So, I was out today doing some errands in Santa Monica. I wasn’t wearing anything special. Jeans and a shirt. My hair was messy and thrown up in a bun. But guess what loyal readers? I got proposed to!

The corner of my proposal!!

Yeah! By a bum on the street!

I had dropped my car off to have some work done, and was walking back to pick it up when the magical moment happened. The light turned green, so I crossed the street. And then as I turned the corner up the next street, He saw me from his spot on the street as I walked by and uttered these romantic words, “I want to marry you.”

So, I bid you adieu fair readers, as me and the bum run off to Vegas to get hitched, as I want to marry him, too! Continue reading

Somebody That I Used to Know: A Sad Single Song Analysis


I often will hear a song on the radio. Find it on youtube. And then play it nonstop. And with the amazing invention you might have heard of (if you haven’t, what rock have you been hiding under?) known as SHAZAM, it makes my job of figuring out the songs and trying to remember what the singer might have been singing that much easier. So last week, I heard a song, shazamed it, and this weekend looked it up on youtube and have since been playing it nonstop, per the usual. And per the us, I want to know what the hell is being said. I love looking up lyrics and actually trying to figure out songs are saying. So first, before you are like, stop it already, just tell me the stoopid song….here it is: Continue reading