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Sad Single Gal of the Day: Helen Gurley Brown, 1922-2012

If you have never heard of Helen Gurly Brown, then maybe you have at least heard of Cosmopolitan Magazine? Well, before that, Helen was actually the original Carrie Bradshaw….

Because before Carrie, Miranda, Charlotte, and Samantha could freely strut their stuff in Sex and the City….the world had to learn to accept that women HAD sex when it wasn’t with their husband! AND, that maybe they could be in control! SHOCKING, I know! So, Helen wrote her book that changed the way women (and men) think….

The original title was actually going to be Sex for the Single Girl…..but that was a bit to risque in 1962!

Helen’s book went on to influence women- both good and bad….because no matter what people thought, it at least created a debate. It at least got people thinking about women as more than just the “Donna Reed” perfect wives or adulterous whores…it found the middle ground. And we wouldn’t have much of the female icons that came after if Helen Gurly Brown never sat down to write her book…in fact the creator of Mad Men, Matthew Weiner frequently attributes her work to the inspiration of the female characters that exist at Sterling Cooper Draper Pryce (oh wait, he’s dead!….spoiler alert if you haven’t seen yet, whoops!)

So thank you, Helen Gurly Brown, for all that you did to change the world! Especially, might I add, thank you for telling me 100 Best Sex Tips, His #1 SEX Fantasy, 99 SEX Moves, and Hot & New 50 Sex Tips

 

You will be missed…..but not forgotten….thank you for celebrating the Single Gal all those years ago!

 

 

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Sad Single Gal of the Day: Jennifer Aniston

MAZEL TOV, JENNY!!! YEA!!!!!!

For all you Jennifer Aniston haters out there- SUCK IT! Let her be happy! She got screwed over by Angie’s demon vag that snapped away her hubby and has been the fodder of the tabloids for YEARS! Example:

Well, as anyone who knew me growing up could tell you, I have always be a fan of Ms. Aniston. I even had a really ill-fated attempt at a “Rachel” that just did not quite look as good on me….

But Jen has proved to us SSGs that if you hold your head up high, that one day a guy will like it enough to put a ring on it again !!! (Now, can i question the whole men proposing on their birthday thing? Is it to make remembering that anniversary easier?? Huh???)

To the FUTURE Patron Saint of Sad Single Gals, L’Chaim!

 

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Sad Single Gal of the Day: Anyone in This Crazy LA Heat

Holy Hotness!! Really, Los Angeles? Gross…this is just gross! We basically all look like James Brown after a marathon performance every time we leave the comfort of the Air Conditioning:

He does not “Feel Good”…right?

You all know that this is you….and it is not a good look. It’s not cooling down at night here, so going out last night was pretty frusterating…since your makeup was literally dripping down your face by the time you stepped into the not adequately ventilated bar. ATTRACTIVE!

 

So enjoy the sun, and don’t overheat…I guess manage to TRY to stay cute (even with the power of the sun making deodorant obsolete for sweat….also is there such a thing as breast deodorant? seriously it is so hot, that there is sweat EVERYWHERE!)
And you can find me somewhere like this today:

Or really, just sitting in my air-conditioned room with cold water and netflix….

 

 

 

 

 

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Sad Single Gal of the Day: Lena Dunham for The New Yorker

UGHHHHHHH! Seriously, can I barf on her? She is filled with such smarmy self-satisfaction of “I don’t fit into the confines of typical Hollywoodness that I’m just going to be so weird and make you believe my weird is so wonderfully weird and acceptable.” UGGGGHHH, even the way she speaks make me want to punch her….

Take a look at the video (this oh so “clever” video) that Lena did for new app for The New Yorker:

Sorry if you are in love with this nonsense, but really?? Come on sweetheart, stop it! Stop making fun of things in your highbrow, highwaisted world that you have concocted for yourself! And before you say, “SSG, she creates such a positive self image for girls!” BULLLLLLL to the SHITTT! No! The characters on her show are all overprivileged Girls with over realized expectations. Because you know what? I actually do exactly what the mom in the pilot said to do when Lena’s character was cut off and complained that she was “the voice of her generation.” I have a fucking job…and I write a blog! So, I guess this SSG of the Day also goes out top all you ladies who sit and stare at the TV and think “that is so my life (or the life I want)” while you watch Girls. Because really? I’m serious….REALLY???

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Switch Day

So I have said this before, but I went to overnight camp. In fact, I loved overnight camp. It was wonderful. It was an all girls camp, and it was this magical place that you would escape into for 8 weeks of the summer and not really care how you looked, what you wore, if you were being crazy, if people looked at you while you were being crazy, and it was a blast! We dressed in pajamas all day long, and our hair was a frizzy mess most of the time (being that it was a mostly Jewish camp!), we sang and danced on our tables in the dining halls, and we just DID NOT ever care!

This isn’t from my camp, but it could have been…I have many a picture that look JUST like this.

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